Monday, 19 January 2009
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Life's Too Short To Be A Bitter Ex
My last relationship didn't end badly. To an extent, it didn't even end. We somehow just sort of faded way. We got together just before I left for Germany. I've been here for a year now and, well, we just didn't make it. (Pretend with me, please, that this doesn't sound like a Jr. High band camp story.) Nobody can be to blame for this. We just didn't have a chance to make a deep enough connection and didn't work to keep what we had strong. I really liked him, though.
I haven't dated since we ended. I'm OK being single, and I guess I still had a glimmer of hope for us upon my return. That's a no-go, however, because he's in a new relationship now.
Flashback: It took a year to really get over my first love. (Ridiculous, I know, but that first one can really get to ya.) I'm not going to be like that with this ex. Nope. Life's too short to dwell on something you can't change. He's moved on, and my life isn't going to end without him.After a year in Germany, I'm looking forward to seeing him. I plan on looking him in the eyes, smiling, and wishing him the best. Even if it hurts a little inside, I'm going to mean it, and I'm not even going to think about a "what if."
Do you wish your exes the best, even if they move on before you do? Have you ever looked back without thinking "what if?"
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Comments (5)
I can definitely relate to this...My ex-boyfriend likes another girl, although she rejected him...Of course I keep thinking that maybe someday we'll get back together or something, and if it happens, great! But I'm trying not to expect anything. I'd rather be his good friend and help him when he needs me than not have him in my life at all because I'm bitter and can't get over him. So good luck! Hopefully you'll meet someone better than your ex someday. :)
If getting over an first ex-boyfriend for a year is ridiculous, I'm not sure how will I call my situation before - it took me 4 years to get over an ex-boyfriend. But the best thing about us, we remained good, good friends. I often hear comments from other people that it's very unlikely for an ex-lovers to be friends but we're not like that. We value the friendship we built even before we got together. Sure, there were times I asked myself what if we never broke up? It would have been a lot happier but it's just not meant to be. Now, he finally has a girlfriend. As an ex-girlfriend, I'm a bit sad about it. The new girlfriend is one lucky girl! But as a good friend, I am happy for him. I really believe that he deserves to be happy. :) And you were right, life is too short to be a bitter ex-girlfriend. :))
@cute_sushi@xanga - Thanks for sharing! I agree that's it's more important to keep special people in you life, even if the circumstances have to change. Good luck to you, too!
@pumpkin_19 - Four years isn't that long if the relationship is really close. The fact that you two can be close friends is really amazing. You were friends before dating?
His new SO may be a lucky girl, but I'm sure he'll feel the same way about your next boyfriend.
@daenglisch - yeah, we're friends before we got together so i don't think we had reasons not to be friends again after we broke up. but then, it doesn't happen to all people, it's still depends on the reason of the break up and how much two people value each other as friends. :)